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I like to imagine the person writing that review agonized for half an hour on whether "sexual associate" wouldn't be more accurate. It allows wood workers, carpenters, and home improvement specialists to attach different blades, sanders, files, and brushes to a reciprocating saw, essentially turning one tool into about six. Add me to the weekly Newsletter. It seems like there should be some sort of rule that masturbation aids never require you to pour in more maintenance than an actual relationship. I know we are all built differently, and that sensitivities vary from person to person, but I'm genuinely concerned that some of the reviewers might be pounding themselves into paralysis. This is not a hobby group that likes to be tied down figuratively. The tool pictured above is called a reciprocating saw adapter. Don't make me do this again. Don't have an account. Soren is a Senior Writer for Cracked. I have never planned anything as far in advance as these people have planned to hump an electric dildo saw.

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Description: It's so important to that guy that you know he used this tool for cleaning grout that he says it four times in one paragraph. Photoplasty Photoplasty. Use My Facebook Avatar. Call me prudish, but I will never be able to give you what you want, because we walk different sexual paths, you and I. They steer clear of labels like "boyfriend" or "wife" and opt instead for weird, clunky names for the person who presumably stands in the room watching their significant other pounded senseless by a steel robot. The machines they are discussing, by the way, are essentially sexualized jackhammers. And it's not just their knowledge of mechanics that's impressive. And then there are some reviews that have passed so far through the ceiling-mounted looking glass that their tone is impossible to discern. For every Nigerian Prince, every subscription wall, every online convenience fee, there are 10 more people who aren't asking for any money at all and who just want to help you find the best electrical appliance to hump. Maybe you didn't know it, but Amazon. And that's absolutely fine, but I will do my best to never end up in a room alone with you. Continue Reading Below.
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